Why Self-Improvement Drives Me To Be Better

If you ask my friends to describe me, they’d probably say that I am a pretty confident and outgoing guy.  It’s a fact that I’m very proud of, not just because it’s a really flattering description, but because these are personality traits that I didn’t always have. A few years ago, I was a very different person from who I am now and self-improvement was the catalyst for that change. 

Me At 16 Years Old

When I was 16, I was a shy and introverted guy, I kept to myself, spending most of my time reading books and playing video games, like Minecraft, with my small group of friends. It was extremely fun and I thoroughly enjoyed myself, but, with this lifestyle came one really big drawback: I lacked self-confidence.

This was present in the simple things that I would do:

Presenting a school project? Clammy hands in seconds; Ordering food? Cue panicked stuttering; Talking to girls? Nevermind, it’s embarrassing just thinking about it.

Long story short, it sucked.

I felt like I should’ve been better at doing these simple tasks, and admitting that made me angry, angry at myself for not having that confidence, and envious of the people who did. 

These emotions proved to be the push that I needed to start my self-improvement journey and I decided to aim high, looking at some of the most confident people I knew about.

I wanted to be to have the magnetism of Will Smith, the humor of Kevin Hart, and the speaking abilities of President Barack Obama all at once.

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I needed to prove to myself, that I could change who I was and that these goals weren’t just some distant fantasy. 

And it seems luck was on my side.

Making The First Steps Towards Self-Improvement

Shortly after, I found my first self-help book, the aptly-titled (and now discontinued) “Charisma on Command”. Its cover simply read: “Inspire, Impress, and Energize Everyone You Meet”. 

It was almost too good to be true, it promised everything that I had wanted, it was my ticket to a better Isaiah, but, it wasn’t as easy as it seemed.

Eager to learn all that I could, I tore through the book in less than a week, but, I was disappointed to see that I didn’t undergo any immediate transformation. I was still the same introverted and unconfident kid that I was before.

That’s when I understood that I didn’t just need to know the right things but I needed to do the right things too, and that meant I had to practice. 

My self-confidence was like a muscle, I needed to train it consistently if I wanted to see lasting change.

(Looking back, this seems obvious, but at the time it felt like a huge discovery to me)

With that in mind, I started tackling some exercises and techniques that were outlined in the book, from the seemingly simple, like “smile at everyone you see today”, to the decidedly more terrifying, “strike up a conversation with a stranger.”

It was a rough start and the change was slow, but I was improving, and that feeling was addictive.

Seeing My Confidence Sky-Rocket

Flash-forward a couple of years and I was a different guy; striking up conversations with strangers (guys and girls alike!), taking up a leadership role at my high school, and even competing and placing second in a public speaking competition.

Although I was still nowhere near making thousands laugh like Kevin Hart or being the next Man In Black, I had at least started on the path to the confident me that I had envisioned, and more importantly, I was better than I was when I started.

This change showed me that no matter where you begin (in whatever pursuit it may be), that given the right amount of time and effort, you can always improve. This is a mindset that I now try to practice in all aspects of my life today.

Improving my self-confidence was my first jump into the world of self-development, and I’m writing this blog in the hope that this story and my self-improvement in the future encourage you to improve that thing in your life that you always wanted to.

If I can do it, I think you can too.

Who knows? Soon, self-improvement may just end up driving you to be better too.

– Isaiah :^)

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